Recent days.

I am now in happiness ^_^. Relax.

19th November, a perfect ending day. I said good bye to Taylor's College main campus, Subang Jaya. I felt heavy to leave college. But I left, because we have to step forward. My feelings were reflected in Dave's blog and Jet's blog. At night, our AT class had a party for gathering. The party was meaningful, it meant a lot. It was like farewell for 2 friends, a birthday party for 1 friend, and a gathering for us (AT, 2004, sem4 students). We were all enjoyed. I felt that WE really became a group or a class. The feeling was nice. We are together. Perfect.



20th November, came back to hometown, after I stayed in Subang for more than 30 days to finish my projects. It was quite a long time. And, I reached my home at night. I was feeling comfortable, happy. The feeling was not strong, and of course it was not needed to be strong, because I do not feel something strong in home as I feel comfortable and balanced.


21st November, we picked some durians which dropped. There is a durian tree over the river behind my house, few rows of pineapples and banana trees beside my house. A small, one storey high house, is surrounded by familiar green environment. It is nice. Don't you think so? ^_^

The last day of this semester

Now, is 2.55am, 19th November. I should sleep, but feeling something... Yesterday was the end of this semester (or it should be said - last semester? ^_^ . to avoid causing confused, i use - this semester)

Friends, especially for my friends in architecture course:

Yesterday, it should be a pure happy day, but it was not pure, it was "polluted".

Yesterday, we did final presentation and submitted all the works. i was happy because i submitted all works to end this semester. My group have done very excellently in presentation, i was just about 'OK lo' . Anywhere, we have done well in presentation overall. I learnt a lot in the process of producing this project which can be applied in life. I really appreciated the process of doing this project with my group members together (Jet, See Kuan, Kristie and i). But from the beginning to the end of presentations, i knew that some of my friends were sad and disappointed. I won't mention much about it here. Just feel that luck or fate sometimes directs the way how the result come out to be. In this case, luck or fate may become the "constraint". May be we should try to keep/ develope our best if we are in bad luck. This become the chance (or i would like to say in "opportunity) for us to train ourselves, to develope ourselves, so that we can still work out something good under the constraints. The constraints may become the foothold to reach higher grade. I was imppressed by Richard Rogers's words --
"Take the strength from constraint, turn the problem of its head and make an advantage of it."

Movie? Life? movie=life?

I watched Matrix Revolution just now. It is a nice movie. Although, I don't understand all the parts of the movie, but I think I got something there.
There are few sentences which are familiar in the movie because they were adopted from previous episode, such as "Mr. Anderson, welcome back." This sentence made me 'smile in heart'. It is so familiar, like Arnold's "I will be back." Funny.

This movie is attractive from many angles and sceneries, like dialogues, fighting, war, periods that 'chasing time', etc. There are a few states in the movie touched me a lot. But, unluckily, I can't state all here due to English problem ^_^''', so I talk a bit here.
**
One part of the movie... Oracle is asked for an answer of this question:" Why you know all the things?" She answered:" I don't know all, I just believe in." Another part... Morpheus was asked why he believes that Neo can create miracle. He(Morpheus) said:" He(Neo) do what he thinks he supposed to do." Here, you can see that how strong is the power of belief. Oracle doesn't know everything, but she believes, they come true, become truth. Neo too, he believes in his ability to destroy Smith, so he did. Actually, he can't overtake and destroy Smith, but he has method, he used his body and sacrificed himself by "borrowing" the power from the 'super machine' to destroy Smith. So, it was a trick for Smith that he thought he can win in the fight with Neo. As a conclusion, you believe in something, then you have the confidence to turn something desired to reality. Because, you believe, then you have the intention to act, to do enthusiastically to reach your dream.
Besides, I am interested about the word "wall" in the movie. There are a few "walls" of Zion for protection and defense purpose. When the "wall" of defense is being destroyed and penetrated by machines, humans are afraid and despair because their "wall of belief and hope" is also being demolished. The actors and actress have done well that part. Coincidentally, the word "wall" is the extension of my understanding in "wall" which is the title of my latest studio project.

Anywhere, I think there will be other series or episodes extended from this matrix series coming within these few years. It is because there are some unanswered questions at the end of this movie.

A good movie.

Belief... i believe in something for a period of time, it is still going on with the flowing time. But, my belief brings nothing, it is zero belief -_- . A bit dissapointed... a bit down... but nothing can be done. or i am the one who expected too much. Now, i think of See Kuan's presentation about ups and downs of life. In life, we can not reach some parts forever, they are the realms beyond my life although i am eagerly to touch the realm. I think there is an invisible insulator between the realm and me. I can do nothing because it is life.

Happy today

Now is dusk after heavy rain. The sky outside is colorful and mainly yellow in color. I am happy. ^_^

You know why? It is because i think that i did a good presentation of final studio project for me myself. Maybe others may thinked it is not that such good presentation. But at least, it was the best presentation in my life. Maybe i have earlier and well prepared for other things, like drawings, printing, modeling, etc, before going through presentation just now. These preparations saved time for me rather than rushing for presentation at last moment. So lucky ^_^

This is the work i have done for roughly about 2 months. -_-''' It was such a long time!!! Anywhere, it is the model of the gallery designed for a china artist/calligrapher named--GuGan.

Think of someone

Now is 2:42 am. I supposed to be sleeping at this time after long time working on studio project. I was tired and finished all the drawings of studio project about one hour ago. But now, I am still in front of the computer, not that I am addicted to computer nor online. Just because I can’t sleep.

There is raining outside, again. I think of someone, again.

Thinking of someone, is really an inevitable ‘element’ of life. It is not categorized as negative nor positive habit. It can be both at once. I don’t hate/ dislike the feeling of thinking someone because I always do this. Actually, I quite enjoy this feeling. Why I enjoy thinking of someone? I don’t know the correct answer. I think… Maybe because I have ‘feeling’ on that someone, maybe I have the strong desire to see that someone, maybe that someone is so impressive, maybe I owe that someone something in life, maybe that someone is one of the parts that cant be separated in my life, etc. Or, it is because of all the answers above!? It is a good question for me myself.

Actually I am becoming enjoying the feel of thinking someone. I think it is because I am now living alone in Subang and sometimes feel lonely. So, in stead of placing myself in alone and feeling lonely, I will make the illusion that someone is accompanying me mentally while I am thinking of that someone. Further, I don’t ‘make illusion’ actually, but it ‘comes’ to me. In other words, it is so natural for me to think of that someone.

For me, thinking of someone, is a feeling-mind-working-cycle (I don’t know a suitable word in English to illustrate my thinking). I said it as a cycle because thinking of someone can not exist the whole time, it may stay, fade, disappear and reborn. That is the reason that I sometimes/ suddenly think of that someone so strongly, want to talk to her so eagerly, and hope to see her so desperately. It is the power of thinking someone. ‘Refer to the source’, it is the power of relationship/ link between human beings.

Sometimes… Just regret that I didn’t spend more/ ‘enough’ time with that someone. But I always say to people: do not wait to be regret. So, instead of feeling regret, I think of something positively from the lesson. ^_^

-the end- 3:10am
(sigh… tomorrow how to wake up!!?? Pimples grow some more!!??